A Father’s Heart

A Father's Heart: The Difference Between Being a Father and a Daddy

There's a profound difference between simply being a father and truly being a daddy. While any man can hold the title of "father," it takes something special to earn the relationship title of "dad" or "daddy."

What's the Difference Between a Father and a Daddy?

A father signifies a title, but a dad signifies a relationship. Every man who has a child is technically a father, but not every father takes on the deeper role of being a dad. A father has a child, but a dad takes care of that child - emotionally, spiritually, and physically.

Some men like to have children but don't want the responsibility of raising them. As the saying goes, "If you play, you need to pay." Being a father and a dad isn't a part-time job - it requires full-time commitment on top of all the other daily tasks we handle.

How Can I Be a Good Dad When I Didn't Have One?

Many men struggle with this question. When my son was on the way, I sat in my car and thought, "I don't know how to be a daddy." My own father left when I was just 5 years old, choosing his own desires over having a family.

But God had a plan. He placed men in my life to help develop and shape me:

• My Uncle Herman, who taught me practical skills like hunting, fishing, and driving

• Brother Vaughn, who became my spiritual father

• Other spiritual mentors who guided me along the way

God knows you inside and out. He knew what He placed within you so you could become the dad He designed you to be. No matter what your father did or didn't do, God has a plan for you to be not just a father to your children, but to be their dad.

What Are the Keys to Being a Good Dad?

After 46 years of experience, I can share five simple but powerful principles that transformed my fatherhood journey:

1. Stay Consistent in Church
2. Give Consistently
3. Pray Regularly
I was raised to believe men shouldn't cry, but God showed me that in His presence, it's okay to be vulnerable. When we're tender before God, we'll be tender with our children.

4. Read and Study the Word
5. Tell Others What God Has Done for You

What Can We Learn from Jesus About Father-Child Relationships?

Jesus demonstrated the difference between acknowledging God as "Father" (title) and relating to Him as "Abba" or "Papa" (relationship):

• When speaking of God's authority, Jesus used the title "Father": "I must be about my Father's business" (Luke 2:49)

• When teaching others to pray: "Our Father which is in heaven" (Matthew 6:9)

• But when facing His greatest trial in Gethsemane, Jesus showed relationship: "Abba, Father... Take this cup away from me" (Mark 14:36)

In His most difficult moment, Jesus didn't just appeal to His Father's title - He cried out to His "Papa." This intimate relationship is available to us too. Galatians 4:6 tells us that "because you are sons, God has sent forth the Spirit of His Son into your hearts, crying 'Abba, Father.'"

How Important is Forgiveness in Fatherhood?

One crucial step in becoming the dad God called me to be was forgiving my own father. You might say, "You don't know what my father did to me." I don't, but I know the forgiving power of God.

When I forgave my dad, something amazing happened - he began to change. Eventually, I was able to share the gospel with him and lead him to Jesus. Now I know I'll see him again in heaven.

Forgiveness frees not just the person you're forgiving, but it frees you to become the father God designed you to be.

Life Application

This week, I challenge you to take intentional steps toward being not just a father, but a daddy to your children:

1. Choose one of the five principles mentioned (church attendance, giving, prayer, Bible study, or sharing your testimony) that you need to strengthen, and commit to it this week.

2. If you haven't forgiven your own father, take that step now. Ask God to help you release any bitterness or resentment.

3. Tell your family you love them - not just once, but regularly. Show them affection and make sure they know how much they mean to you.

Ask yourself these questions:

• Am I being intentional about my relationship with my children, or am I just filling the role of "father"?

• What one thing can I do this week to deepen my connection with my child?

• How can I better model for my children what it means to have a relationship with our Heavenly Father?

Remember, your children love you and look up to you. No matter how old they are, you're still their hero. Don't just be their father - be their daddy.